Dragon Nunchucks & Machete Rulers by Pale Horse

Clearly we’ve evolved toward being a culture in which there’s zero justification to commit acts of violence with “blunt objects”. No, we’re more refined–more designed–and so similarly should be our weaponry. Luckily, Tampa-based designer (and toy collector) Chris Parks (aka Pale Horse) has us covered.

Pale Horse decided to laser-engrave a small edition of hardwood nunchucks basically just because.

The nunchaku feature a high quality laser engraved dragon design with a super tough ball-bearing swivel chain. Perfect for setting any naysayer straight.

There are only 10 of them at $50, and I can’t believe they’re still left. I would buy them, except I believe in peaceful protest (you know the kind that gets you pepper-sprayed in the face). I know there’s someone out there into weapons and design and Japanese imagery though. (Mr. Toybot Studios comes to mind.) Available here.

If you kinda covet those nunchucks, but can’t rationalize buying another object you can’t currently use, I hear you. For you, there’s the machete ruler. It’s 12 inches of laser-engraved “measuring violence” for $20.

The Machete Ruler is really great for the urban fashion designer who can now say: “Measure once, cut twice? How about I cut you?” Somewhere, Lorena Bobbitt is wishing she’d thought of this mashup… Available here!