Brandages: Nothing Says Douchebag Quite Like Gucci Bandaids

Brandages gucci bandaids

I want to think Brandages is a joke, but if it is, they haven’t yet dropped the punchline. If you thought a Bandaid with built-in Neosporin was fancy, get a load of Gucci Bandaids and Chanel, Louis Vuitton, Burberry and Takashi Murakami ouch strips. According to their website, Brandages are “All-Purpose Designer Bandages [with] original custom designs to compliment top fashion brands.”

Hmmm…let’s ponder this:

  1. Bandages actually have one purpose. There is no such thing as an “all-purpose” bandage. They’re not some sort of multi-function utility like a Swiss army knife. Brandages will not turn into an umbrella orĀ flotationĀ device in an emergency.
  2. I’m not sure how plagiarism via plaster is either “original” or “custom”.
  3. This ad campaign is baffling. Why do so many women cut themselves on the cleavage?!
  4. While there are plenty of possibilities to find something offensive about Brandages, my top issue is their misspelling of the word “complement”. And actually, come to think of it, lawyers for Gucci, Burberry, etc. are unlikely to find Brandages complimentary or complementary.

At least Brandages are fun to write about (and good for a Murakami meta-joke).